I want to lose body fat, see abs, stop restricting foods, workout less, not worry what other people think, stop bingeing, stop obsessing over food, eat more, but have that really lean look and see definition.
I hear you, I think I can go through having each one of these thoughts in one single day, but the truth is these are all different goals that are going to require a different approach and need to be addressed in order.
Fixing your relationship with food and having a strong healthy mindset always comes first because that's your foundation. If your foundation is cracked with low self esteem, binge eating and bad habits then I have to be honest your'e not going anywhere sustainable. Sure you can white knuckle it and get lean with a meal plan, but then what? Why work so hard to always crash and burn and start over?
You can't work the system backwards and come out on top! Here I share a little portion of my journey. The thing that I have engrained in my brain is your health is a journey not a destination. We are all works of progress and when you stop growing, quite frankly your dead. Come be alive with me and lets go on this journey together. Click on the contact button, or better yet get on my schedule and let's do a complimentary health assessment. Click here to schedule https://coachelicia.youcanbook.me
I had an "a ha" moment the other day while I was getting ready. A lot of my good thoughts or ideas come while I am in the shower, or I am mindlessly doing my make-up and hair.
As a side note ladies. Listening to an audio book while getting ready is a great way to fly through a couple of books a month.
It has been a weird week for me. My husband has started a new job and doing a lot of traveling, so it is just me and my little. We are still adapting to this whole kindergarten thing and getting back into a routine of volunteer meetings and Jujitsu classes at night. Needless to say getting ready is not at the forefront of my mind everyday and gym clothes all day have sadly become a norm this last week.
I am a bit of girly girl. I like cute clothes, jewelry, accessories, and most definitely a cute pair of shoes. Now don't get me wrong I can get down and dirty with the best of them, but I will probably look cute while I do it ;)
I was at a baby shower last weekend and this is what stimulated my a ha moment. At the shower one piece of advice that was given was as a new mom take care of yourself. Get in the shower and take some naps while baby is sleeping. Don't worry how crazy the house looks. I remember being a new mom and I wanted everything to be perfect. A week after I had my son my body was like hold it sista, you are way overdoing it. Since I wasn't chilling out, my body forced me to and I had a horrible case of mastitis and could barely function. I don't remember a time before that, that I had been so sick.
Our bodies are strong, capable, and very smart. We need to listen to those and hear what they are really telling us. My lips will instantly tell me if I haven't drank enough water in the day. If I eat too many sugar loaded carbs I go into a sugar coma and get a sugar headache. I know better, but yet I still do it once in awhile. insert hand slap to the face ;)
While getting ready and actually putting effort into curling my hair and putting more than a little gym make-up on. I could feel my demeanor change. I felt more confident and a little more at ease. It didn't take a ton of time, about 25 minutes, but when I was finished I was much more ready to conquer the world, even if it was just conquering picking my son up from school, going to Costco, and dropping him off at Jujitsu.
Now not everyone may have the same feeling or effect that I do from "getting dolled up", but I am pretty certain. Slash that pretty positive that I know if you take a little time for yourself everyday to do something for YOU. You will see a positive change in your life and others will get to reap that benefit from you being a happy, positive, productive individual, so although you may be doing something for yourself. It is not selfish!
Here are a few ideas to start practicing self care.
I have a lot of favorite movies, one of them being the movie "The Holiday". If you haven't seen it, you definitely should. It's about two women (Cameron Diaz & Kate Winslet) who are having guy problems and swap homes in each others countries, where they each meet a local guy and fall in love. One part of the movie, Iris (Kate Winslet), is talking to the older neighbor Arthur. Arthur is a 90 year old screen play writer who ends up helping Iris retrieve her self esteem. At one point they have this conversation...
Arthur Abbott: He let you go. This is not a hard one to figure out. Iris, in the movies we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason you are behaving like the best friend.
Iris: You're so right. You're supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god's sake! Arthur, I've been going to a therapist for three years, and she's never explained anything to me that well. That was brilliant. Brutal, but brilliant.
For some reason we allow ourselves to become the best friend in our own lives. We let life overwhelm us. We still show up for work, make dinner for our family, but we are just going through the motions. Life isn't meant to be nearly survived, its meant to be lived.
You are meant to be the lead of your own story. Take responsibility for your own life for your own happiness. I am equally as guilty as scrolling through social media and find myself comparing body, life, success; even though I feel like I should know better. I see it with my 5 year old. We all just want to fit in and be liked and included, have friends. What makes us liked though is who we are as individuals. I love the saying "you just do you boo".
It is easy to get caught up in the if I just do this... then I'll be happy. If I have this... then I'll be happy. Reality is you must choose to be happy, grateful, or fulfilled. Moving, traveling, or getting away is just geography. It's not about where you are, but who you are. No matter where you are, you get to wake up everyday and try to be the best version of yourself. And the best news is we get to wakeup and try again the next day :)
Comparison is the thief of joy or the death of joy; however you want to say it. Stop comparing yourself to other people. The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday. Intentionally choose those things that bring you joy and do more of it.
Get rid of the things that are weighing you down. You become who you surround yourself with and what you consume. Your diet is not only what you eat. It is what you watch, what you listen to, what you read, the people you hang out with... be mindful of the things you put into your body emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
You are in charge of your own life!!! There is not one thing in it that your not allowing to be there!!!
When is the best time to workout???
You can look into the science of this, but you will find mixed reviews. Some say morning, while others say night. Let me give you the real answer.
The best time to workout for you is when you can be the most consistent. Look at your week ahead and find what works best for you. Different seasons in my life I have worked out at different times.
When I was in college. I didn't have classes until the later afternoon and into the evening, so I worked out in the morning. It was the "nice" morning time like 9am. When I graduated and started working I had to be there at 9. That wasn't super early, but it did cause me to re-configure my schedule. I found that after work I could NOT get my buns to the gym. I could make every excuse possible. I'm hungry, my feet hurt, I'm tired, the gym is too crowded at that time, the list could go on. What I found to work for me is learning some discipline and getting my butt out of bed early. I made a goal to be at the gym by 6:15.
Working out early has its advantages. It gets you up and moving. My workouts were focused because I had a specific amount of time to get in, and get it done, and be on my way. I found I was more awake and alert for work and overall I had a positive happy demeanor.
My advice is make time for yourself. You make time for everything else, so make time for the most important thing. YOU! Look at your schedule and schedule your gym time. Schedule it in your calendar. Make an appointment with yourself. Show up and don't be late. Don't skip out on yourself.
We have all had that flaky friend before. The one that you make plans with and at the last minute is sick or something comes up and they have to cancel. You still love them anyway, but you just know they are that flaky friend. Don't be the first person you break a promise to. I think most of us work hard on keeping our promises, but when it comes to ourselves we are the first person we break a promise to.
My point in all of this is find what works for you. If that be waking up an hour earlier, or if thats going at night when your kids are in bed, or doin an at home workout with your kids or during nap time . Find what works best and what makes you feel good. Don't be the flaky friend that finds excuses. Getting in 3 days a week is better than getting in none.
You wouldn't skip a meeting with your boss in his office, right? Don't skip the time you invest on yourself!!!
As I was driving to Lyman Lake I had this scared to death tight as can be knot in my stomach. It was the first time driving alone to Lyman (well Landon was with me, but you know he is 5, not much help in a crisis) not only was I driving alone, which doesn’t really bother me, but I was pulling my adorable Shasta Baby trailer. My hands were sitting at a prompt 10 & 2 and there was no music that could distract the knot or the tenseness between my shoulder blades. As I drove through the swervy canyon and tight laned corners I wasn’t even thinking about food , which is a first as well. Ha ha.
Okay I tend to be over dramatic, but I was nervous. As I went on my merrily way I thought about when I first learned how to drive. Changing lanes was a huge deal. Once I mastered that getting on the freeway and merging seemed like an even bigger deal. Now I have the heaviest foot you know and zoom around like its my business to figure out what lane I want to be in, and road signs are just there for a suggestion or to let me know “hey, you have ½ mile till your exit, you better do some evil kneiveling to get across all 4 lanes of traffic”
Pulling this trailer humbled me. I had to drive slowly. If I started to go to fast you could see it shaking back and forth. My car didn’t go as fast as it normally does because it was puling extra weight. I watched every signed that warned to slow down for sharp corners. There is so many areas that I could take this little humbling experience, but while driving all I could think about is how I am a strong capable women. Yes I can ask for help. Yes I let people do things for me once in a while, but dang it I am strong and I am capable. There are times in life we have to do things that are hard and out of our comfort zone and after we finish with these tasks normally we feel pretty dang good. We didn’t die and we just gained a little more confidence. Living your life and not growing or changing is not living.
Say your wanting to get started on becoming healthier. It’s a change. You have to break bad little habits that got you to your point your in. Its uncomfortable and it may feel more comfortable to eat the comfort food, but that’s not living. That’s not growing. That’s not pushing yourself to becoming a healthier version of you. You may look around and cars (people) may be passing you and it may be as frustrating as heck, but you don’t give up. You’re not at your destination. There are signs laid out giving you guidance and you can choose to follow them and make it or do it your way and possibly make it. Following a coach that guides you all along the way will help you reach that destination and be that road trip partner when your feeling tired and defeated.
I made it to Lyman and that last leg felt the longest pulling that trailer through a half hour of dirt roads. My son was chatting excitedly along the way. He saw mom pull the trailer. He saw her pull off at a rest stop and even stop for gas. He saw her do something she was scared to do and you know what I am proud. I am proud to set an example for my son that we can do hard things and we can come out on the other side excited and proud that we are capable.
As I drove through the canyon today. I noticed the leaves are changing. The beautiful golds and reds are coming out. The trees are about to show us how beautiful it is to let dead things go.
Although I dread the winter and cold that comes with it. It is lovely to watch the ground become covered by leaves... dead leaves. Do you have something dead in your life you need to let go of? Perhaps it's like gangrene and it needs to be cut off so the rest of you can be healthy.
It's time to embrace the beauty of letting dead things go. May we have the courage to let go off the hurt, the broken relationships, the bad attitudes, the worry, the fear, the things we have no control over and the dead things from our past...
As the season changes what new changes can you make in your life to let some of the dead things go?