I have a lot of favorite movies, one of them being the movie "The Holiday". If you haven't seen it, you definitely should. It's about two women (Cameron Diaz & Kate Winslet) who are having guy problems and swap homes in each others countries, where they each meet a local guy and fall in love. One part of the movie, Iris (Kate Winslet), is talking to the older neighbor Arthur. Arthur is a 90 year old screen play writer who ends up helping Iris retrieve her self esteem. At one point they have this conversation...
Arthur Abbott: He let you go. This is not a hard one to figure out. Iris, in the movies we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason you are behaving like the best friend.
Iris: You're so right. You're supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god's sake! Arthur, I've been going to a therapist for three years, and she's never explained anything to me that well. That was brilliant. Brutal, but brilliant.
For some reason we allow ourselves to become the best friend in our own lives. We let life overwhelm us. We still show up for work, make dinner for our family, but we are just going through the motions. Life isn't meant to be nearly survived, its meant to be lived.
You are meant to be the lead of your own story. Take responsibility for your own life for your own happiness. I am equally as guilty as scrolling through social media and find myself comparing body, life, success; even though I feel like I should know better. I see it with my 5 year old. We all just want to fit in and be liked and included, have friends. What makes us liked though is who we are as individuals. I love the saying "you just do you boo".
It is easy to get caught up in the if I just do this... then I'll be happy. If I have this... then I'll be happy. Reality is you must choose to be happy, grateful, or fulfilled. Moving, traveling, or getting away is just geography. It's not about where you are, but who you are. No matter where you are, you get to wake up everyday and try to be the best version of yourself. And the best news is we get to wakeup and try again the next day :)
Comparison is the thief of joy or the death of joy; however you want to say it. Stop comparing yourself to other people. The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday. Intentionally choose those things that bring you joy and do more of it.
Get rid of the things that are weighing you down. You become who you surround yourself with and what you consume. Your diet is not only what you eat. It is what you watch, what you listen to, what you read, the people you hang out with... be mindful of the things you put into your body emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
You are in charge of your own life!!! There is not one thing in it that your not allowing to be there!!!